COMPLEX SIMPLICITY

So much to say and yet I struggle to find words that fill the lines in my mind. I’m excited. This friends, is a true statement simply because we finished our record and its amazing! I’m in a relationship and that too is amazing even through the hard work. We’re on our third record and that nowadays is unheard of, so humility is my only true emotion right now.
I see the blessings of my life and think; wow…I don’t deserve any of this. My lifestyle hasn’t warranted any of the things I possess and yet here I am in charge of the thousand cattle on the hill (pardon my use of metaphor).
When looking from the outside, most of the things in my life seem to be simplistic and occasionally expected and yet to me I’m still lost as to how I got here and where do we go from here. I’m full of faith and yet doubt at least once everyday. I have enough courage to attempt and complete a task for God but when I’m done I begin to fill with insecurity if he’s going to bless it. I have goals that are Godly but my flesh begs to differ. What a state of ambiguity and displacement!!!
I feel like Jesus when he was riding that donkey into Jerusalem while the crowd yelled “hosanna, hosanna!” His disciples there cheering and even feeling a sense of pride that they were affiliated with such a man. The entire city wondering in awe who is this man whom they call the son of David, the true prophet.
All this happening and yet in the mind of Christ the same people currently chanting hosanna will be the ones yelling crucify him! The disciples who are so bold in their approach of the gospel, whether correct or not, will be the same ones who flee and run from the profession they’ve confessed. Even Jesus entered into a state of inner conflict confessing “let this cup pass from me” only to submit and say “not my will but yours…”
What a savior…what a love. We have one life that yields many opportunities, some of which are good and some bad. Some decisions seem simple to one person and extremely complex to another, but still the decision must be made. I say we live life with a passion that screams “bring it on!!!” We welcome the ambiguous nature of this life and face it head on with a faith that we may not understand all the time, but still trust.
I don’t know what this year will bring for me and my group, but I know what God will bring. He will bring me peace in my success and failures. He will offer me hope to believe when hope seems to be my enemy. He will be I AM… and that is all I need him to be.
Love you all.

Manwell